I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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