just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Randomize