Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Found your dick twin last night
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Randomize
