Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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