the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
