I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
