How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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