I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
How does it feel to date your dad?
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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