So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
