Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
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