I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
