Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize