Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
