Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
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