two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
