What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
