It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Randomize
