bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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