Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
