Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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