Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
