we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
