so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
