doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
