Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Randomize
