no. you can't hotbox the world.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Randomize
