is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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