That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize