before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize
