I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
