I want to have your abortion
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
