cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Randomize
