It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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