Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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