I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
ttyl tear gas
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
