it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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