Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
