I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
