There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize
