I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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