You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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