WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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