Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Omg I joined a choir last night...
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
