she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
