he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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