oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Randomize
