i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
