this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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