Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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