i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
